There are no 'bad' relationships.

Updated: Oct 9, 2019

by Ananda


All my two-way reactions in the world are actually reflecting my own one-way self-perception.


All relationships with lovers, children, parents, friends, and colleagues are trigger points of separation from unity. Our source is one and based in love. We take part in the physical material world as separate, to learn, to fall over and over again so we can GROW in LOVE.

There for every interaction with “someone else” (separate from us) is an invitation for movement, talk, energy exchange...


Our responsibility= ability to respond - in the human manner (we can also respond from our primal animal lower brain- survival mode - at times this is needed!) is determined by how much choice we have in a given situation.


Most “problems” (or learning situations) in relationships are connected to the fact that person A takes person B’s words in what we call: a “personal” way.


Or more precise: giving person’s B’s words or actions an INTERPRETATION that comes from persons A’s “wounded child” = the false idea that he is less than pure LOVE.


In the polarity of Blame - Responsibility we tend to talk this way: “YOU did this and that TO ME...” that’s blame. Instead of “when I saw/ heard YOU DOING this action/ saying that word I FELT ANGER IN ME. = that’s responsibility for me creating an anger response to an outside (separation based) trigger.


Most important is that I understand that it’s YOUR anger. 


It might :

1. come from your past and be projected on me.

2. be a reaction to my behaviour.


In both cases it’s about something that is outside of me!!!


If I take it as FALSE interpretation: you don’t love ME, that comes from MY wound: I AM NOT GOOD = BAD - ugly, stupid, ignorant, insensitive, selfish... 

at that moment my responsibility moves to the PRIMAL BRAIN as I feel under ATTACK!! Level of responsibility will be around defence or attack as I am in FEAR with not much choice or possibility for communication and creation.

A lot of people are “answering back” to accusations with justification, explanation or threats. It's a matching vibration to a fear-based communication.

The opposite, assuming a choice made from the ability to respond (responsibility) is: “I hear YOUR words, I feel YOUR pain” it is YOURS. It is not ME or MINE. Because I KNOW ( knowing is a deep state of being) that I AM LOVE, I also know that YOU ARE LOVE (you just behave from fear, it is a BEHAVIOUR not YOU) - I don’t need to attack/defend. My ability to respond is in the level of seeing how I can support you and/or the situation from fear back to love.

May we all grow in love,

Ananda


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